Who Foots the Bill for Wedding Expenses?
Did you know that, once upon a time, the bride’s family was expected to pay for almost all of the wedding expenses? And, while some families may still hold true to this tradition, many do not. After all, it seems a bit unfair, especially given the rising costs of weddings these days. Furthermore, the groom’s family may be wealthier than the bride’s family. Or, what about when the bride doesn’t have much family to speak of?
While tradition may work in some circumstances, today’s couples tend to be more equitable for a range of reasons. This is nice, but it can also cause some confusion and uncertainty. If you’re currently struggling with how best to handle the responsibility of those rising wedding costs, here are a few solutions that might work for you.
Go With Tradition
While tradition may not be the “norm” anymore, it can work in some circumstances. Thus, if the bride’s family is capable of footing most of the bill, feels comfortable with it, and is willing to do it, there’s certainly nothing wrong with allowing tradition to win out. Just make sure everyone involved truly is okay with it. Having a dual family discussion ahead of time can avoid hurt feelings and rumpled feathers, particularly when one family is taking on the bulk (or all) of the expense.
Take a DIY Approach
Many modern couples don’t feel comfortable asking their parents to foot any of the wedding bill. This is especially common for brides and grooms who are getting married later in life, who don’t have close relationships with their parents, or who have been married before. Whatever the reasons, there’s certainly nothing wrong with deciding that you, as a couple, prefer to handle the wedding costs yourself. It will give you more control and allow you to do exactly what you want without any guilt. Plus, more often than not, family members and friends will chip in or make donations toward your big day anyway.
Split the Bill
Perhaps the easiest solution is to have both families split the wedding costs. Or, you could do a three-way split between the couple, the bride’s parents, and the groom’s parents. No matter how you divvy up the costs, if everyone pays a little something, no one feels left out or taken advantage of, which often makes this solution the easiest and least stressful.
Whether you’re getting married in Maui or your own back yard, weddings are costly, but your relationships matter more than any dollar amount. With that in mind, try to handle your wedding expenses in a way that’s fair to everyone and that keeps anyone from being offended. Of course, that’s easier said than done, but if you encourage open, honest communication and put people’s feelings above “rules” or tradition, you can make it happen.
