What To Do When Your Parents Try to Control Your Wedding
If you’re like most people, then you love your parents dearly. After all, they’re the people who raised you and who love you unconditionally. However, even the best parents can get a little overbearing when faced with a wedding. Whether it’s in Maui or your own hometown, it’s an emotional event with a lot of feelings floating around, and parents who boss and control are probably just trying to regulate their own emotions. Plus, they really do want the best for you. But, that doesn’t mean that you have to let them step in and take total charge. Here are some tips to keep your cool and your control.
Set Clear Roles And Expectations
When no one knows who’s in charge, the loudest or most bossy person often steps into the role all on their own. If you don’t want that to happen, set clear roles and boundaries at the start of the planning process. Decide who will do what and who is in charge of what and communicate those roles loud and clear. When everyone has a place and a function, you’re less likely to have people competing for power and trying to take control.
Don’t Let Money Talk
Parents who are paying for all or part of a wedding might feel entitled to control your ceremony. However, that’s not how it should be. Any contributions to your big day should be because they love and care about you, not because they want to decide what your wedding is like. If parents are overstepping because of money, gently remind them that, while you appreciate their financial help, it’s still your wedding. If that doesn’t work, you may have to turn down their contributions. Even if it means settling for a smaller ceremony, it’s worth it to have the wedding you want the way you want it.
Express Love And Gratitude
Finally, though it may seem childish, some parents get bossy because they’re feeling left out and unappreciated. To keep that from happening, just be kind. Regularly tell your parents that you love them and that you’re happy they’re going to be a part of your big day. Thank them for letting you be in control and for not being “nightmare parents.” If you praise what they do well, chances are they’ll keep doing it.
With your parents, you might still feel like a kid. But, in reality, you are an adult, and you get the final say over your wedding. Remember that, follow these tips, and proceed with confidence. From there, everything should go off without a hitch.
